Since I’ve started this blog I’ve been praying every day. Usually in the morning right after I wake up (and go have a pee!) and also before bed. I’ve found that on the days where I don’t pray straight away in the morning and leave it to a few hours later I get kind of cranky. Similarly, when I don’t go through my nightly routine and then pray before bed I find that I don’t sleep very well.
This past Sunday I found that I was really suffering from some anticipatory anxiety. I had this block of 5 hours where I was freaking out that I would never be able to find a job. Browsing job websites did not help at all. I’m worrying about something that is well over a year away. While yes, I am going to be done with university in a mere three days I have already committed to serving in AmeriCorps NCCC for 10 months starting in October. AmeriCorps doesn’t end until August 2013 and yet here I was having a mini-meltdown over my employment situation. Can you tell I’m a worry wort?
I think the whole thing had something to do with things in the news I’ve been reading lately. And while it would be nice to give up having to look at horrible things going on, my major depends on knowing what is going on in the world, even when those things cause some internal strife. Like how the suicide rate in Greece (which used to have the lowest rate in Europe) is rising because of the economic situation. People are killing themselves because they cannot pay their debts and/or afford the basics like food to eat. On the other hand, I was reading about how half of university students who have graduated since 2009 are unemployed or underemployed and how many cannot afford to pay their student loans.
Needless to say, I’m adding a new prayer into my repertoire.
Consoling Thoughts (for times of loneliness)
Make me remember, when the world seems cold and dreary and I know not where to turn for comfort, that there is always one spot bright and cheerful—-the Sanctuary.
When I am in desolation of spirit, when all who are dear to me have passed away like summer flowers and none are left to love me and care for me, whisper to my troubled soul
that there is one Friend who dies not
—-One Whose Love never changes—-
Jesus on the altar.
When sorrows thicken and crush me with their burden, when I look in vain for comfort,
let me remember Your words:
“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will refresh you.”